Dealing With Grief

Today, I am aching.

From the inside out. 

I hurt in a way that I am just not used to hurting.  Yet, I am thankful and humbled that I have had 31 years with one of the most amazing women on the planet.  I could say that she changed my life, but really she helped to shape it.  She was like a rudder on my ship, and her strength and fortitude helped me stay the course. 
She survived the Great Depression, war, divorce, racism, sexism and raising three children as a single mother. 

But she didn't just survive, she lived. 

In my thirty one years, I've never seen her bitter   She never complained that life was not fair.  She squared her shoulders, bowed her knees, and embraced us tenderly.  Her ninety five years were marked with dertermination, sacrifice, joy and love. 
She was also an entreprenuer.  She owned and operated a very successful dry cleaners in the heart of a thriving community, in a time when women were not afforded such opportunities. 
Even in her last years, she was full of spunk, and tenacity.  Her wit was just as quick as it ever was, and her eyes still shined brightly.
She was well loved and will be celebrated by many.

So, yes, my heart is heavy, but I am not overcome.  Her legacy goes on and all of the things she built with wisdom, remain until this day.  She also knew Jesus, and I am comforted as I remember that to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord.  I know she is in that great cloud of witnesses, cheering me on as I run this race that is set before me.